Find Your Way Back
by MutedTone
Summary: Cagalli does the unthinkable, and her relationship with Athrun is tested. Will it ever be resolved? Set postDestiny.
1. Chapter 1

Find Your Way Back

started:02/20/2006 3:46 PM

"We appreciate your prompt arrival, Yamato-san." Kisaka's tone was hurried, as he gestured the brown-haired young man into the heavily-secured compound.

"Mou, no need to be formal. Just Kira, please."

They paused briefly at the inner gate, and Kisaka's expression was apologetic as a somber security officer frisked Kira. Kira shrugged back at his sister's right-hand man, as if to say "I'm used to it."

His sister. With quick strides he went through the familiar path, right, left, up the staircase, and at the end of the hallway would be Cagalli's room. Behind him Kisaka's voice trailed.

"It was Mana who found her. You said I should call you if anything happened, and I did."

Kira nodded in reply, and braced himself as he entered the double doors. Mana was standing at the foot of the bed, weeping softly. The Athhas' private doctor was bent over a still-unconscious Cagalli's right arm, wrapping gauze around the wrist. On his sister's left a pair of nurses were examining the IV drip. With a soft groan she opened her eyes, just as the doctor had finished dressing her wound. She looked around the room with a perplexed frown. Mana began sobbing anew. Kisaka sighed in relief. The nurses stood back as Kira rushed to her bedside. "Cagalli?" he prompted gently.

Her gaze was steadier now, she was coming out of her stupor. Her fingers twitched, and he grasped her hand. A single tear ran down her cheek, and he felt her hold tighten. "It's okay, you're safe now," he said in what he hoped was his most reassuring voice. He could never get used to being the strong twin. Often it was he who needed to be comforted by her.

Cagalli said nothing but made an effort to sit up. Kira helped her, taking care not to disturb the IV line. He felt a sudden pang as he saw the scar on her left wrist, stark white but already fading. He knew she often wore long-sleeved clothes, or bracelets, or cuffs, just to hide that scar. Now she'd have the other arm to worry about, he thought wryly.

Dr. Shirota put his medical tools away as he addressed her. "The local anaesthesia will wear off soon. I used a laser to seal the cut. It's the latest technology, and should leave only the slightest of scars." He looked at the siblings through his glasses. "You're very lucky that we got to you in time. This was a deeper slash than before."

Kira glanced at Cagalli, in case she said something, but she didn't. He followed her gaze towards the almost-brown bloodstain on the pale peach carpet, and inwardly winced. War veteran though he was, he hated the sight of so much blood. "Thank you, doctor," he mumbled.

Kisaka cleared his throat. "I trust that you will all keep this incident private, as before?" The nurses quickly nodded under his piercing gaze.

"Of course," Dr. Shirota replied. "I haven't been private doctor to the Athha family for nothing, you know-"

"Who found me?"

Shocked, everyone turned to the Orb princess.

"Who found me?" she asked, more impatiently.

Mana approached her. "I did, Cagalli-sama. When I was taking up your breakfast." She put a hand to her chest at the sudden frightful memory.

"Cagalli-" Kira interrupted, putting an arm about her shoulder. He knew where this was going.

She ignored him. "And you called the doctor?"

Kira gave Mana a look that said, "No, tell her no," he pleaded but the nursemaid missed his meaning.

"Yes, I-!"

The room filled with female shrieks as the bedside lamp shot past Mana's head and into the wall.

"WHY DIDN'T YOU LEAVE ME ALONE!" Cagalli's eyes blazed with fury and would've rushed at the elderly woman if Kira had not held her back. "I WAS SUPPOSED TO DIE! WHY DIDN'T YOU LEAVE ME ALONE! WHY DIDN'T YOU LEAVE ME ALONE TO DIE!"

Kira might have been amazed at her sudden almost-demonic strength as she struggled to free herself from his hold, if only he wasn't too busy stopping her from killing anybody else. "Calm down, Cagalli!" How could she, after losing so much blood, still be able to kick and thrash and scream as she did? He thanked the high heavens for his Coordinator strength. He turned to the two nurses, who were still too surprised to move. "Get Mana out of here, please!"

"YOU STUPID, USELESS IDIOT OF A WOMAN! I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU!"

Swiftly the nurses escorted the sobbing Mana outside. Kisaka moved in to help Kira hold down the still-struggling girl.

"Hold her steady," Dr. Shirota instructed, taking out some supplies from his bag. "Could you turn her head to the side?"

Kira quickly pulled Cagalli's jaw towards him. She has stopped screaming, but was still crying with rage. The doctor pressed a staple gun-like instrument to her neck. After a "click", she stopped struggling. Her breathing became quiet.

The three men held their breath.

"Kira?" she mumbled, looking up at him with drug-dimmed eyes. "Don't...don't tell him, okay? He doesn't have to know…."

"But..."

"Promise me you won't tell...him…." Her eyelids dropped shut and her body was limp.

"That will give her about four hours of rest." The doctor closed his bag and handed something to Kisaka. "If she expresses mania again, give her this. Keep watch over her for a few days. I'll be back to check on her then. The nurse will take the IV out tomorrow." He turned to Kira with a face that said, "Good luck, young man," and hurried out of the room.

Gently Kira placed her head against the pillow. Kisaka was looking at the instrument handed to him with a somber expression. The brown-haired Coordinator shook his head. "I need to make a few calls."

* * *

"Something to drink, Mr. Zala?"

He shook his head gently. "No, thank you. I'm fine."

The flight attendant smiled in understanding and continued down the aisle. Athrun sighed and brought out his cellphone from an inner coat pocket. Absently he flipped through the menus. At the very top of the call list, Meyrin's name and number glared accusingly at him.

"_Hey, Athrun, where'd you go? We're supposed to meet Onee-san and Shinn and the baby tonight at the new restaurant! I called you at the office but your secretary said you left early."_

_He chuckled. "You're way ahead of me aren't you? I was just going to call you up because, well, something came up…so… I can't make it tonight."_

_Silence.Then "Oh, okay. I guess I'll go without you. "_

"_I'm really sorry."_

_She sighed. "Ah, well, I didn't mean to sound so nasty. It's just that we hardly ever see you now, and this was planned ages ago, and I've been looking forward to it and…." Her voice became shaky._

_He heard his flight being called at the spaceport terminal. "Hey, I have to go now. I'll make it up to you and Luna and Shinn when I get back, okay?"_

"_Wh- You're at the spaceport?" Another pause. "You're going to Earth."_

"_Yeah."_

_A sniff._ "_You're going to see her, aren't you?"_

"_Yeah."_ _Athrun could've sworn that he sounded apologetic. "It's a little sudden, I know."_

"_She IS your girlfriend. And it's none of my business anyway. Have a nice flight."_

The line had gone dead before he could put another word in. Athrun passed his thumb over the keypad, wondering if he should call Meyrin back, then realizing that he had left the spaceport so he couldn't. He looked out the window the black emptiness. Meyrin was so persistent, some would even consider her annoying, but she was so earnest and loyal in her affection, always there when he needed to talk. Yet he couldn't feel the same way about her as he did about Cagalli.

He blushed as he realized he had said Cagalli's name aloud, although it was just a whisper. He leaned back in his seat and flipped through the pictures on his cellphone until he reached the one taken at his last birthday. Kira and Lacus had thrown him a surprise party at their place, and Athrun had asked Kira to take a photo of him and Cagalli out on the brightly-lit balcony. He stroked the tiny screen affectionately. She'd grown her hair long, and it was less shaggy. Her golden eyes sparkled with fun and her smile exuded confidence. Their wineglasses were raised and he had an arm around her waist.

It was a wonderful birthday.

He looked out the window again, suddenly impatient to arrive at Orb. He knew it would take at least 12 Earth hours to travel from the PLANTs to any continent. He knew it all too well. As Councilor of Martius City and chief engineer of the Space Transport department, it was his pet project to develop a faster, lighter mass transport vehicle that would cut space travel time by at least half.

It was to everyone's surprise that he stepped down as PLANT Chairman two years ago, and contented himself with being a Council member. Yzak Joule had eagerly assumed the Chairmanship, and, Athrun noted (with some satisfaction), was probably realizing that with the glory of the title came the pressure, paperwork, and intrigues. Athrun smiled knowingly. It would be good for the hotheaded Yzak to be Chairman, and to learn to think before speaking, and not to let his emotions cloud his decisions.

Athrun's own resignation was not without its share of media speculation. Some said it was fatigue; others, a failure to settle the long-standing dispute between entrepreneurs clamoring for increased energy sources and environmentalists vehemently against nuclear energy use; others still, a breakdown in his relationship with Cagalli Yula Athha, Representative of the Orb Union.

Well, maybe the last had a speck of truth in it.

_It was a year or so after the last war, and the two of them went hiking through the mountainous area of Onogoro one evening. On a high peak they sat and waited for the sun to rise up from the hills and shine through the trees._

"_Wooooooooooowwwwwwwwwwwwww," they said in unison at the breathtaking sight, like two kids who had stepped into Candyland._

_She leaned her blond head against his shoulder. "It's so beautiful."_

"_Mmmm."_ _With one hand he pulled her close. "But I can think of something just as beautiful."_

_The head Representative of Orb laughed. "Really? What?"_

"_This diamond ring on your left ring finger." With a magician's flourish he held it up for her to see._

_A pause._ _Then Cagalli laughed, louder this time. "Oh my God, Athrun, that has got to be the CHEESIEST proposal in the universe!"_

_The raven-haired Coordinator pretended to pout. "I spend several nerve-wracking months combing through the finest jewelry shops in the PLANTs for an engagement ring, and she laughs at me when she sees it."_

"_Hey, don't be mad. I was just kidding." She lifted a hand to her neck. "But I thought you already gave me an engagement ring."_

_His eyes followed her fingers to where they pulled at a ring with a reddish-purple stone that was strung on a gold chain around her neck. It seemed like a long time had passed since he'd slipped it on her finger, when he was so afraid that he was going to lose her soon that he had to do something, anything, to keep her to himself. She'd been worried about misplacing the ring that she'd used it as a pendant instead. "I know. I just wanted to make it official. So what do you say, Cagalli Yula Athha?"_

"_Umm…." She shifted uncomfortably. "We don't have to get married right after being engaged, right?"_

_It was his turn to laugh. "No, we don't. Although I would really want to, as soon as possible. Who knows how many evil fiancés you've been promised to? I don't want you to be with anybody else. Just me." He brought the ring up to the sunlight, making the stone sparkle. "Is that okay with you?"_

_Cagalli sat up with a sigh. "Athrun…." She took both his hands in hers. "There's no one else I want to be with either."_

_He almost choked with joy. "Is that a yes?"_

_She bit her lip momentarily. "But this isn't the right time."_

_Thankfully, his fingers didn't drop the ring at those words. "Why not? The war's behind us, both the Earth and the PLANTS are rebuilding. Everything's settling down."_

"_That may be true, but the Orb Union_ _would oppose our engagement at every turn. They'd comb through all the royal families to look for another match for me. My detractors could attack me for not observing legal protocol. The peace we've achieved is still fresh and fragile, Athrun. There are still people in Orb who want your head for the Heliopolis_ _incident. And there are members of the royal families who would enjoy seeing my head roll as well."_

"_But you could turn any bad press on its head. Our engagement –besides our personal relationship- could be symbolic of the peace effort between Earth and the PLANTs. A union of a Natural and a Coordinator-" Athrun shook his head in frustration. "Ah, it's all too politically complex."_

"_So you understand." Her brown eyes were somber. "I'm not saying no. I'm asking you to be patient." She folded his hands over the little golden band that seemed so very heavy in his palms now. "Will you keep this for me until I can wear it?"_

_Athrun forced a smile. "Of course, princess."_

"_Agh!_ _Don't call me that." She pressed her forehead to his. "And remember, it's my ring. Don't you dare give it to anyone else!"_

"_I won't."_

"_And don't lose it. If you do I'll have to spank you."_

_He raised a dark eyebrow. "Will you really?"_

_The Orb Representative rolled her eyes. "Athruuuuuuuuuunnnnnnnnnn…."_

"_Hey, just kidding -!" Then Cagalli's arms were hugging him._

"_I'm sorry it's like this," she murmured against his ear. "If things were different…If our lives were simpler…."_

_He hugged her as well. "Well, I could resign as PLANT Chairman tomorrow and kidnap you and take you to some deserted tropical island."_

"_Now you're being silly. Aren't I supposed to be the silly one?"_

"_Or we could fake your death."_

"_Athruuuuuuuuuunnnnnnnnn….Look, we'll work this out, okay? You and me. So please don't lose your feelings for me."_

"_I won't. And make sure you have no fiancés lurking around."_

_When he went back to December_ _City, he buried himself in work as usual, but every now and then he'd take out the ring and stare at it. Why did he agree to take the Chairmanship? he wondered. It was taking up time that he'd rather spend visiting Cagalli. Why did he have to be born a Coordinator? In many ways, that separated him from her too. _

_He resigned a few weeks later._

"_Oh, great Haumea."_ _Cagalli shouted into his private phone line after hearing about it on the news. "I'm not even going to ask you if this has anything to do with me, because I know it does!"_

"_Well, it was a thankless job anyway-"_

"_Don't lie! You wanted the position because you wanted to make up for the atrocities your father and ZAFT committed. You wanted to turn things around." She sighed. "You threw that chance away, and it's my fault."_

"_But I AM working for that goal. I'm a Council member still. So don't blame yourself." His voice softened. "Besides, now that I have greater freedom of movement, I can visit you more."_

"_So it really is all about me." Her voice was filled with guilt._

"_Don't be like that. We'll work things out, like you said. You and me."_

"Work things out, huh," Athrun whispered to the window. He put his cellphone back into his coat and closed his eyes. It would be some time before he reached his destination.

* * *

A/N: Thanks for the reviews! I've changed the spelling of Meirin's name to the standard Meyrin (smile). 


	2. Chapter 2

Athrun was ushered through the kitchen, the informal dining room, and into the landing on the first floor. Kira was pacing about, a mobile phone held to his ear, his shoes squeaking on the marble tiles. Nearby, a young woman whom Athrun recognized as one of Cagalli's official press team was at a desk, also taking calls and scribbling notes. Kira caught sight of him and gave a nod of recognition while saying "Yes, well, if the official press statement says so….Eeto, that's out of topic. I'm sorry but I have to disconnect." With a look of disgust he cut off the call and paced towards the raven-haired Coordinator. "Athrun! I'm glad you made it here quickly. Sorry about having to transport you in the fruits and vegetables truck."

"It's all right." Athrun laughed. "Although I haven't had to travel in secret for a very long time. You've become quite the public relations officer."

Kira sighed, a vein almost popping from his forehead. "I can't believe how snoopy the media is around here! The press team was forced to release a statement of illness to explain why Cagalli's absent from her duties. Now that I'm here, the reporters are harassing me as well." At this point they had gone up the stairs to Cagalli's door. "Miriallia and Dearka are in there, so I guess she's awake. She's calmed down some, but she seems so…ano…out of touch. Talking to you might help her."

"I hope so. Thanks, Kira. For telling me about it."

The former Freedom pilot put a hand on his friend's shoulder. "Please help my sister, Athrun. I don't know what to do anymore."

Athrun's shoulders slumped a little. "I don't know either, Kira. Right now I have more questions than answers."

Just then Kira's phone rang again, and with a murmur of "Excuse me for a minute", he walked down the hall.

With a heavy sigh, Athrun knocked on the carved double doors and pushed them open.

"I'm really sorry that you had to do all the work because of me, Miri. If I'd known I would leave so much paperwork behind, I wouldn't have killed myself." Cagalli's voice drifted through the doorway, followed by a sarcastic laugh. "Or maybe doing all that bureaucratic junk would've killed me sooner!"

"Now, don't talk like that, Cagalli," Miriallia replied gently. "Oh, Athrun, there you are."

"Here's the prince to see his lady love," Dearka teased, receiving a sharp elbow from Miriallia. The two were sitting near Cagalli, side by side.

Athrun almost swore that the room grew quiet as he went toward the bed where the blond princess was sitting. The effect of her clean white nightgown was marred by the thick bandage around her wrist and the blank look on her face. "Hi…." _Hi Cagalli, you're not dead, which is great news. And just what were you thinking, cutting your wrist like that?_ "Um, I got you some. Flowers." He held out the large bunch of elegant Casablanca lilies. He knew they were her favorite kind.

She accepted the bouquet without a word, placing them in her lap and staring down at the pink-white blossoms.

"Aren't those pretty?" Miri chirped. "Dearka, why don't you give Athrun your chair? I think," and she stood up as well, "that these two have a LOT of catching up to do and WE had better get going. Time and paperwork wait for no one!" With bright smiles at the "two" being spoken of, she dragged a very confused Dearka out of the room and closed the doors.

Then, the room was silent.

Athrun sat in one of the vacant chairs, not quite believing that the girl sitting in bed was Cagalli. She seemed thinner than before. Her hair was quite scraggly, and there were dark circles under her eyes. She used to have such a determined expression on her face; today, there was only defeat.

He wondered if he ought to wait for her to speak, when she finally did.

"I told Kira not to. But he told you anyway." She was still staring at the lilies.

"He felt that it was the right thing to do. I agree with him."

"Hn." A sniffle, then Cagalli's fists clenched on the bedspread. "You shouldn't…have to…." she choked, "…see me like this!" Then her head slumped over the flowers, a large tear dropping over the lily leaves.

"Cagalli…." Instantly he was beside her, resting her head against him. "It's okay. I'm here."

"NO!" she sniffed. "It's not okay! I said I could be strong, but I'm not strong. Would a strong person do this?" She thrust out the bandaged wrist. "And I even did it TWICE!" She ran a finger over the scar on her left wrist as she cried like a repentant sinner.

Athrun tightened his hold on her, unsure of himself. She was sobbing so much that she was coughing. _What should I do?_ he wondered. _Well, what CAN I do?_

"I'm messed up," she groaned, burying her face in his chest. "Oh, good Haumea, I'm all mixed up."

* * *

"Athrun seems to be so busy these days. It's been ages since we last saw him," Lunamaria mused, tucking her daughter Sophelia back into the baby pram. The child had been born with a full head of shiny red hair, the genetic heritage of her parents.

Shinn snorted. "He's always going off somewhere. I always knew there was something sneaky about him -ow! Why are you hitting me, Luna?"

"If I weren't across the table from you, Shinn, I'd hit you too," Meyrin scowled. "Bad-mouthing someone like that when he's not here to defend himself."

"Err…." Shinn gulped, suddenly caught between the evil stares of two redheaded sisters in a very posh restaurant. "Sorry."

"Good," Luna nodded in self-righteous satisfaction. "But seriously, Meyrin, you give Athrun too much attention. It's bad for both of you."

"I do not!" the younger Hawke sister declared, crossing her arms. "Not really."

"I'm sure there are other men out there just like him. Why don't you give yourself a chance to like somebody else?" Luna persisted.

Meyrin felt her eyes prickle, and she shifted her gaze to Sophelia, who was peacefully sleeping in her pram. "You're wrong," she said at length. "There is no one else like him."

* * *

"Ssshhh. It's over now. You're safe." Athrun hoped he sounded convincing as he rocked Cagalli gently and patted her hair. She had quieted down somewhat, though her narrow shoulders still shook from the force of her sobs.

Kira's head popped in from the doorway. "Is-is everything all right in here?" he asked nervously, as though expecting to see his sister in a wild rampage.

"We're fine," Cagalli mumbled grumpily, trying not to hiccup. "Are you going to watch me break down again, huh?"

Athrun had to smile as her personality surfaced. "It's fine, Kira. I've got her."

Kira pondered for a moment, then shrugged. "Well, okay. Now I have to ward off some annoying media people. I'll get back when I can." Then he closed the doors.

"He always tries to do the right thing," Athrun chuckled. Then nuzzling Cagalli, he murmured, "I see that your bad temper has returned."

"Hmph," the injured girl huffed, nuzzling him back. Her slightly swollen brown eyes looked up at him. "Let's go to the window seat."

He offered her a hand to get up, but she waved him off. Reluctantly he paced to the window seat, sat down – and stared in shock as Cagalli reached into a nearby drawer and fished out a pack of cigarettes, a pink lighter, and a bright red ashtray.

As she lit up a stick, he said carefully, "When did you start smoking?"

"Since the job of being Head Representative started to piss me off," Cagalli answered, plopping into the window seat and placing the ashtray and lighter on the windowsill.

"Hrmmm." The green-eyed Coordinator sighed. "You could have told me about it."

"If I did, you'd tell me to stop smoking and I can't. I've been lighting up for quite some time." She blew a puff of smoke out the open window.

"I wasn't talking about your smoking." He looked at her gravely. "Running a country is a tough job for anyone. But you don't have to suffer the problems alone. You can always talk to me about them. I thought I was the one who knew you best." Gently he touched the ashtray. "But it turns out that I'm always the last person to know."

Cagalli flicked some ash into the small red bowl. "If I had told you that I was sick of politicians trying to prove that I was no good, or that I was fed up with trying to enforce a truce on warring states, or that the other Orb reps are advising me to marry men that I couldn't care less about, what would you have done? Would you rush to Orb in your Gundam, pick me up, and run off with me to the edge of the universe?"

"I could do that. Or I could resign from Martius, and stay by your side like I used to."

She snorted. "That's no good. Everyone already knows who Alex Dino really is." She inhaled sharply from her cigarette. "Besides, I know you can't leave your job, just like I can't leave mine. I mean, look at Dearka. He left ZAFT to be here with Miri, and he's been reduced to a used-car salesman. He doesn't complain, but Miri knows he's not really happy. Also, you and I have too many responsibilities that keep us apart, for the sake of changing Earth and the PLANTs." She lowered her lashes and tugged at her necklace. "It's like there's you…and there's me…and the universe is in between."

Athrun reached towards her and lifted her necklace pendant. It was the ring he'd given her, so long ago. "But you wear this still."

The blond princess gave a quick, sad laugh. "Oh, I guess I sort of promised myself that I would keep wearing it until the day I died." She laughed again, shaking her head in mock disbelief as she stubbed out her cigarette. "Until the day I died."

He took her right arm and gazed pointedly at the bandage on her wrist. "So you weren't planning to wear it for a very long time."

She drew her arm back. "Look, maybe I'm just TIRED of everything, okay? I'm tired of being trapped in this stupid life of mine. I had to take matters into my own hands." Quickly she lit another stick.

"Well, what about me?" He couldn't keep his voice from rising. "Did you ever think about how I would feel once I found out that you were dead? That I was all alone?"

Cagalli dropped her gaze. "There's always Meyrin," she murmured, casually blowing smoke out the window.

"Leave Meyrin OUT OF THIS!" He clenched his fist at his side, fighting the urge to knock that annoying cigarette out of her fingers. "How can you say something like that? Meyrin isn't you…Cagalli. It's not the same thing. She's not the girl I met once on an island. She's not the girl I gave that ring to." His vision turned cloudy. "If you were gone, I…I wouldn't know what to do anymore. I've lost too many loved ones. I'm not ready to see another gravestone, especially not yours."

She looked straight at him, wide-eyed.

He leaned back against the window, fighting back tears, and noticed the brownish bloody spot on the carpet. "Did you think that if you died, the world would stay the same? What about the people you left behind?" _Miguel…Nicol…Heine…so many others lost in the war…._ "Would they go on living their lives as though nothing happened? Everyone is important to someone. You CAN'T just decide to die." He looked at the cigarette butt in the ashtray. "It's selfish."

Furiously Cagalli threw her half-finished cigarette out the window. "Well, maybe I AM selfish! But so what? I've given up my time and energy for the people of Orb. Can't I be selfish, even just a little? Don't I own my life anymore? If I make the lives of many citizens happy, but I can't reach my own happiness, what's the point?" Her fingers raked through her hair. "I can't take it anymore! If I can't be with you, then what's the point of even staying alive, huh?"

"Cagalli…." _What did we ever do to deserve this pain? We only wished to love. _Slowly, his arms reached to gently embrace her. She struggled against him for a moment before breaking down in tears. "I'm sorry." He hadn't seen her this sad and angry since the time when they both believed that Kira had died by Athrun's hand. "I wish I had all the answers now, but until I do, until WE do, you can't die on me."

She sighed in exhaustion. "I don't know, Athrun." Her shaking hands grasped his. "I'm just so tired. I wish I could just fly away and leave everything. But so many things weigh me down."

"You could do that, you know." His cheek rested on her shoulder. "Fly away. I'll take you far away from here."

She shook her head, as though refusing. "I can't leave Orb, really. What would happen if I did? Miri's the only sensible government official I know."

With sudden inspiration, Athrun stood up. "We'll see about that."

She watched him nervously. "What are you planning to do?"

He opened that door and looked around the hallway. Kira was just coming in from the top of the stairs. "Where are Dearka and Miriallia?"

Kira looked surprised. "They just left the estate."

"I need to call them back. It's about Cagalli." _I'm getting her out of here, no matter what._

* * *

"Absolutely NOT. Out of the question." Kisaka frowned and leaned back in his chair, arms crossed.

Kisaka, Athrun, Cagalli, Kira, Dearka, and Miriallia were seated around a table in the library beside Cagalli's room. Kisaka's reply to Athrun's suggestion definitely increased the tension in the air.

Athrun threw his hands up in emphasis. "Sir, it's just for a month. Surely your press team could make up an alibi for her, like, hmmm, she was going on charitable missions around the world and preferred to remain anonymous?"

"That sort of story won't hold up for a day!" Kisaka leaned on the table. "I don't think you fully understand Lady Cagalli's situation. There are political families in Orb who would take steps to undermine her authority if she were absent for merely half a day." He glanced at the blond girl who sat quietly beside Athrun. "She is a responsible leader and she understands the burdens she must bear for Orb and the world. I'm already risking much by tolerating your relationship with her. But what you ask is unacceptable."

"You're the one who doesn't understand!" Athrun grabbed Cagalli's right arm and held it up for all to see the thick bandage. "Fine, I get it, she's got political duties. Is that all she is now? Duty?" He put her arm down. "And speaking of duty, YOU were supposed to look out for her. Yet you just stood there and let her try suicide TWICE! Is dying the only way she can take a break, huh?"

"Yo, Athrun, calm down." Dearka made a placating gesture with his hands.

Kisaka looked contrite after Athrun's outburst. He sat back and rubbed his forehead. After a long pause, he said, "I admit that I was remiss in my duties and I can assure you that it won't happen again. But for her to leave her seat for a month…. The fact remains that she is the Head Representative."

"The fact remains that she is human. A 21-year-old human," Athrun argued. _I'm wasting time. I WON'T take no for an answer._ He sat back, as though thinking hard, then suddenly he pulled Cagalli to his chest, making her gasp – and pointed a pocketknife to her throat.

Miriallia choked back a scream.

"What do you think you're doing?!" Kira shouted.

"If you won't hand her over nicely, then I'm going to have to kidnap her! And you'll NEVER see her again. The media will definitely enjoy that! Then you'll have REAL problems," Athrun explained through gritted teeth, a manic gleam in his eye. "Nobody move! Or she's dead."

The blond princess didn't struggle in her captor's arms, just closed her eyes, as though death was no longer a threat to her.

"Please, Mr. Zala, this isn't necessary-" Kisaka began.

Everyone else sucked in his or her breath as the knifepoint was pushed higher, almost cutting into skin.

The green-eyed Coordinator sneered. "Oh yes, it's absolutely necessary."

"I'm going with Athrun."

All eyes were on Cagalli as she spoke for the first time during that meeting.

Athrun blinked. "What did you say?"

In a firmer tone, she repeated. "I'm going with Athrun. That's what I've decided. So everyone please shut up and stop shouting. I hate it when people fight. And Athrun, don't you dare point a knife at me again. Ever." Hurriedly, a surprised Athrun put his pocketknife away and released his hold.

Cagalli shifted back into her seat.

"But what about-" Kisaka argued.

With her bandaged hand, she waved him off. "It's just for a MONTH. Just have my press team make up a good, believable story. And Miri is an excellent Secretary of State. She can handle my paperwork better than I ever could."

"Yes, don't worry about a thing," Miri nodded quickly.

Cagalli Yula Attha, Head Representative, stood up and grabbed Athrun's arm. "Let's get out of here."

Still not completely comprehending, Athrun stood up, leaving four very stunned people in the room.

When the two of them reached the hallway, the raven-haired Coordinator pulled Cagalli close and looked at her with admiration. "I can't believe what just happened. You were amazing back there."

Her brown eyes shimmered as she hugged him back. "So were you. Although I didn't expect you to do something that weird." She laughed softly. "Would you really do that? Kidnap me, I mean?"

"I would," he replied earnestly. "But, what made you decide to go? You didn't think it was a good idea before."

"There was a knife at my neck, and I didn't feel scared at all. So I thought, if I'm not afraid to die, there's nothing else I should be afraid of doing." She rested her cheek against his chest. "But Athrun, you could have it so easy. You could have any girl you wanted. A girl who wasn't suicidal and wouldn't give you a hard time."

He sighed into her hair. "Maybe I don't want my life to be easy. And having a hard time is fine. If it's you, then it's fine."

She tried to pout. "I hate it when you're being so nice."

"You still call me nice even after I stick a knife at you?"

She didn't say anything, just hugged him tighter. _I wonder, how long can you really put up with me?_


End file.
